Becoming the Conductor of Your Life with J. Stamatelos

From Survivor to Thriver

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Do you ever find yourself feeling like you’re never enough? Like your inner critics or “judges” are holding you back from self-acceptance and connection?

In this episode of From Survivor to Thriver, we sat down with James “J.” Stamatelos to talk about this feeling of anxious insecurity and the transformative power of self-compassion. Join us as we explore the idea of becoming the conductor of your own life and what anxious insecurity, vulnerability, and internal family systems really mean and how they can either work for us or against us.

James “J.” Stamatelos is a professional coach who helps people break out of fear so they can share their gifts with the world. His work focuses on “anxious insecurity” - a chronic feeling of being "not enough" regardless of how much we achieve. He personally fought this battle, has spent a decade helping those who fight it now, and focuses on evidence-based and data-informed interventions.

Before becoming a coach, J. worked in counterterrorism and emergency response. He specializes in working with men, previously ran the only secular men's group in Pittsburgh, and believes many of our struggles come back to men being unable to process their emotions in a healthy way.

In today’s episode we cover:

• How anxious insecurity can show up in your life
• The cycle of feeling like you’re never enough
• The coping mechanisms we use to cope with anxious insecurity
• The sense of belonging we all yearn for
• The power of internal family systems when working with self-critics
• How your inner self-critic is actually trying to protect you
• How we can become the conductors of our own lives
• The role of vulnerability in anxious insecurity
• Your relationship with yourself sets the foundation for everything else
• Learning to show yourself kindness and love
• The environment that lets human thrive

We hope you enjoyed our conversation with J.! If you want to learn more about how to work with him, make sure to visit his website.

Thanks again for tuning in. We are so grateful to each and every one of you. Please remember to leave a rating and review of our show. It helps us grow and reach those who need it. Also, make sure to subscribe so you never miss an episode!

Links:

Visit J.’s website: https://www.jamesjstamatelos.com/

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“Internal family systems is the most powerful and effective way I've seen to work with self-critics of anything ever. It's unbelievable how effective it is.” -J.

“I've always known I'm pushing it too far when I can't be available to myself or the people I really care about.” -Marc

“We really can't silence that inner critic. We really can't banish anxious insecurity, and we really can't become that conductor, or bring all these parts together, until we really become vulnerable with ourselves and with others.” -Erik