Episode 12: C-PTSD and Moving On - Be Here, Be Now. One Day at a Time

Out of My Mind in Costa Rica-Living with CPTSD

Season 1, Episode 12

C-PTSD and Moving On – Be Here. Be Now. One Day at a Time

January 21, 2021

It is looking more and more like I will be on my own for quite a while. This week I continue to process what is going on in my life. I share my final email to my wife in hopes she will be able to read it with an open heart and mind.

We have our 3rd and hopefully final meeting with Migración, Costa Rica´s equivalent to Immigration in the US. We have been working on this since before we moved to Costa Rica in December 2015. It has been a long, strange trip. There is no reason to believe that this meeting will result in my permanent residency and if I so desire, the next step would be to apply for citizenship. I can have dual citizenship here in Costa Rica. That may not be a bad idea. Until then, I am still a Gringo and if he government wanted to boot me, they could.

I also talk about Moving On. No, not the political organization, but moving my life beyond the boundaries of my marriage with the knowledge that we are not likely to reunify. That is not the worst thing that could happen. I believe we will make much better friends than we were as lovers. It could turn out to be an incredibly positive thing for both of us.

Here are some websites that I hope will enhance your understanding of the material I talked about today. Thanks for coming by. Thanks for listening.

There is an article on Bustle.com Jay Polish lays out the dynamics in relationships when C-PTSD is part of the picture. You can read it in the link below.

https://www.bustle.com/p/how-complex-ptsd-can-affect-relationships-according-to-expert-18007145

If you are thinking about moving to Costa Rica and become a resident, this is where you begin.

https://www.migracion.go.cr/SitePages/Inicio.aspx

There are a lot of people here who are living full time here, but do not apply for residency. They are perfectly happy with the perpetual tourist method. That means, every 90 days they need to leave the country and return. This is not as hard as it may seem and, in most cases, can be done in as little as an afternoon where you drive to the Costa Rican border with Nicaragua, walk across the border, get your passport stamped and walk back into Costa Rica. It is a bit intimidating as the Nicaragua has armed military personnel everywhere and it can be intimidating. Costa Rica is not in a hurry to discourage these people from living this way. Many of them own property and employ Ticos. It’s a case of you scratch my back and I’ll scratch yours.

Here is a nice article from Barton Goldsmith Ph.D. He gives you some sound advice if you are thinking about staying friends with your ex or your soon-to-be ex. Turns out it is not a good idea for a lot of people and if you have C-PTSD then be very, very careful. Prioritize yourself. Take your time.

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/emotional-fitness/201103/10-tips-survive-break