Is It Wrong to Want More?
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We're taught that wanting more makes us selfish, that ambition and desire are at odds with being humble or grateful for what we already have. But what if wanting is actually what makes us human?
From childhood, many of us learn to shrink our desires, and be accommodating, humble, and not take up too much space. We confuse contentment with complacency and mistake humility for self-erasure. But research shows that this conditioning often leaves us chasing quick hits of pleasure instead of pursuing what truly fulfills us.
In this episode, Rebecca explores why we feel guilty for wanting things, diving into evolutionary psychology and happiness research to reveal the crucial difference between hedonic happiness (instant gratification) and eudaimonic happiness (lasting fulfillment). You'll discover how to balance both types while breaking free from the guilt that keeps you stuck in cycles of short-term comfort at the expense of long-term growth.
What you'll learn:
- Why our hunter-gatherer conditioning makes us think success is a zero-sum game (and why it's not)
- The hidden ego behind self-denial and why "being the bigger person" sometimes keeps you small
- How to distinguish between what makes you happy vs. what just makes you feel good momentarily
- Why the most fulfilling experiences often don't feel pleasant in real time
- The research behind two distinct types of happiness and how to balance both
- How to rewire your brain to crave meaningful progress over instant gratification
Quick Actions You Can Take Today:
- Try the non-dominant hand writing exercise to assess what you actually want beyond surface desires
- Identify one area where you've been settling for "good enough" and get honest about what you really want
- Next time you reach for a distraction, pause and ask whether you need comfort or growth in that moment
- Practice reframing one desire from "selfish" to "human" and notice how it changes your relationship to that want
This episode offers hope for anyone who's been taught to want less, do less, or be less.
Because when you get honest about what actually makes you happy, you expand what's possible, not just for yourself, but for everyone around you.
Follow Time Billionaires wherever you get your podcasts so you never miss an episode.
For more insights on turning hidden minutes into your greatest asset, connect with Rebecca and follow the podcast on LinkedIn!
- Rebecca's LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/rebeccashaddix/
- Podcast Page: https://www.linkedin.com/company/time-billionaires-pod
Shout-out to Graham Duncan from East Rock Capital for coining the term "Time Billionaires" which inspired our show name—originally shared on The Tim Ferriss Show.
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