4 Steps for Breaking the Chains of Negative Thinking and Restoring Your Well-Being as an Autism Mom

Thriving Moms of Autistics

Hi Moms! I was in bed trying to fall asleep one night last week and was having a really hard time. I felt so unsettled.

In this episode, we dive into just how common this is for moms raising autistics, why it happens, what triggers it, and tips to shut it down and take back your control.

Find the full transcript for this episode at https://thrivingmomsofautistics.com/94

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What Are Negative Thought Traps and Why Do They Occur in Moms of Autistics?

Back to those nagging thoughts keeping me up…

I kept playing a possible situation in my head regarding someone, who I have to deal with that doesn’t have my family’s best interest at heart.

Have you done that before? It’s miserable. Some refer to it as thought looping, where you play a negative thought or situation over and over in your mind.

Technically, this is referred to as rumination and impacts your well-being if you don’t get a handle on it. We have all done this, but I had dumped that nasty habit a long time ago.

Sometimes, these thoughts creep up and are actually a form of controlling something that feels so out of control.

This is common with anxiety. It is especially common in autism moms. I used to do this much more often, but broke the habit.

Rumination is when we focus on problems or distressing thoughts. It might be a past mistake or situation that happened or might happen. We play it over and over on a mental loop. We feel like we gain control over it on some level, but we are really not.

Moms of autistics are thinkers. We plan to get out ahead of things, which makes it easy to get stuck in this thought pattern.

It’s okay to be a planner, but not when you get stuck or start ruminating.

The Importance of Recognizing Negative Thought Patterns and Taking Back Your Power as an Autism Mom

Staying in the negative loop and ruminating is problematic for several reasons. One is that it feels terrible and is not helpful. You deserve better than that. It’s just not helpful.

That’s why I decided to do this segment today. I know what this feels like and I don’t want it for you. I broke the cycle and I want to help you break it too.

Another reason is that it impacts your well-being and mental health. When you stay in a state of negativity, it makes it difficult to move forward.

You get stuck in patterns of anxiety and depression. This impacts your child as well. They can smell this from a mile away and often take on effects it has on you as their mom.

4 Steps to Help Moms Break the Chains of a Fixed Mindset and Grow?

1. Understand that rumination is a habit and a choice. You choose to stay on the negative thought loop.
2. Catch it early when it happens. Acknowledge it! This can be difficult when it is a deeply embedded habit, but it is possible.
3. Choose to stay in it or remove it. Kick it to the curb! Use the discomfort and pain you experience from it to drive your decision to change.
4. Change the Narrative. You might need to briefly step away from it all together to collect yourself and focus on something positive in your life. This might be reflecting on gratitude and things you are thankful for. Once your mind is in a better place, you can reflect on what you can control in this situation and the wins you will achieve as a result.

Here are some takeaways to guide you in your transforma