Parenting With ADHD: CHRISTINE CUNNINGHAM of PERINATAL WELLBEING ONTARIO

BLUE MUMDAYS

This week I'm joined by the wonderful Christine Cunningham of Perinatal Wellbeing Ontario. Despite sailing through motherhood with her first two children, Christine went on to suffer postnatal depression and anxiety with the birth of her third. In this mega-episode, Christine talks about the shock diagnosis of finding out she had ADHD at the age of 40, when seeking a diagnosis for her son. Christine talks so eloquently about the huge impact this has had on her life and on her role as a mother. A must listen for anyone affected by ADHD.

*TRIGGER WARNING: Postnatal Depression, Anxiety, ADHD*

IN THIS EPISODE WE DISCUSS:

[00:44] Introducing Christine (including her podcast, 'Perinatal Wellbeing').

[02:44] Life before having children - looking back and realising that anxiety was already present in her life.

[03:41] Her oldest son's diagnosis of ADHD and the link back to her.

[04:19] Feeling 'chilled' during pregnancy, labour and delivery and the link between lower levels of oestrogen and ADHD.

[06:00] Having to coach the terrified resident doctor from ER during her first labour!

[07:52] Not doubting herself with her first two sons, but suffering from intense anxiety and guilt with her third.

[10:06] Experiencing the 'baby blues' with her first and how that differed from the postnatal depression she suffered with her third son

[12:15] The expectation that you 'know what to do' by the third pregnancy / struggles with breastfeeding.

[13:05] "I couldn't get my shit together" - developing a fear of leaving the house or being alone with her 3 kids.

[14:40] How this anxiety impacted on her relationship with her older children.

[15:17] Realising straight away that something felt 'off'. Excessive crying, excessive guilt and not being able to make a decision.

[19:16] The fear of going back 'to that place'.

[21:00] Feelings of grief about the experience we lost in early motherhood.

[23:35] Recovery isn't linear - the fear of 'slipping back'.

[24:51] The hell of PND/PPD and the feeling of clarity and gratitude Christine felt when she started to recover.

[27:16] The role of medication and hormones. Introducing the 'Fanny Club'!

[30:24] Davina - fitness videos and the menopause.

[31:24] The impact of hormones on symptoms of ADHD.

[32:04] Getting a diagnosis for her son.

[33:35] Biological males and biological females present differently with ADHD. The misconceptions and stereotypes of ADHD 'behaviour'.

[34:52] Looking back - how the diagnosis helped her make sense of her past, the feeling that she was always 'missing the mark'.

[36:34] ADHD does not mean you're not intelligent! The benefits of a neurodivergent mind.

[38:54] The lack of support for adults with ADHD.

[39:48] The link between ADHD and GAD (General Anxiety Disorder).

[40:46] Christine's initial bias against ADHD medication. The lack of support available when you don't take medication.

[43:02] How an anxiety programme helped with her son's feelings of anger and frustration.

[44:19] Vikki's brother's friend given Ritalin in the 1980s. Christine's concerns over medication.

[45:55] Christine's discovery that unmedicated ADHD is what can lead to addiction - not the medication itself.

[46:52] The stress of homeschooling during the Covid pandemic.

[49:15] The role of executive functioning and how it is impaired by ADHD.

[50:19] Finding the right medication - 'it's been lifechanging'.

[54:27] Mark Williams' late diagnosis of ADHD (see the 'Daddy Blues' episodes). The importance of validation.

[57:37] The intersection of ADHD and postpartum depression. The role of hormones.

[01:00:21] The 'fight or flight' panic of PND and postnatal anxiety. The role of the prefrontal cortex and impaired executive functioning.

[01:05:07] Overwhelm.

[01:09:27] How to get hold of Christine.

[01:10:22] Recommended listen - how you can hear Christine's fantastic podcast, 'Perinatal Wellbeing'.

KEY TAKEAWAYS:

1. NHS information on ADHD
2. ADDA - the Attention Deficit Disorder Association
3. Additude Magazine - article on Executive Dysfunction in those with ADHD
4. ADHD UK - peer support, created by people with ADHD for those with ADHD
5. The ADHD Foundation - the neurodiversity charity
6. Perinatal Wellbeing Ontario – Christine’s website
7. The Perinatal Wellbeing Podcast

If you enjoyed this episode, please share, rate and subscribe. It really does make the difference in helping others find it – which means helping more parents in need.

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NEXT EPISODE:

In a Movember male-mental-health special, I chat to Professor Viren Swami. Viren is Professor of Social Psychology at Anglia Ruskin University and is ranked in the top 2% of 'most-cited scientists' in the world. Viren's research is focused on the promotion of positive body image in diverse cultural groups, as well as mental health literacy and understandings of mental ill-health.

His work has moved on to include paternal postnatal depression following Viren's own struggles with fatherhood. He talks to me very candidly about the effects of suffering from PND after the birth of his son. Not to be missed.

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Action on Postpartum Psychosis (APP)

Moderated Forum, click here to find out more.

Email: [e-mail]

Tel: [phone]

ADDA - the Attention Deficit Disorder Association

National Resource Center (NRC)/ADHD Helpline Health Information Specialists

866-200-8098, Monday-Friday, 1 p.m. — 5 p.m. ET

ADHD UK - peer support, created by people with ADHD for those with ADHD

The ADHD Foundation - the neurodiversity charity

Call us - 0151 541 9020

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AIMS for better birthing.

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Andy's Man Club

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https://andysmanclub.co.uk/club-information/clubs/

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Association of Postnatal Illness

Helpline: 10am – 2pm – 0207 386 0868

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Live chat online facility

Best Beginnings

Free NHS-accredited Baby Buddy app offering

evidence-based information and self-care tools to help parents during pregnancy

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App users also have access to a confidential, text-based Crisis Messenger which provides

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Bi-Polar UK

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Birth Trauma Association

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CALM

Contact CALM

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Cedar House Support Group

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Contact: for families with disabled children

Support, advice and information for parents with disabled children.

• helpline: 0808 808 3555
• website: https://contact.org.uk/

DadsNet

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Family Lives

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• helpline: 0808 800 2222
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Family Rights Group

Support for parents and other family members whose children are involved with or need social care services.

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• website: www.frg.org.uk

Fathers Reaching Out

https://www.reachingoutpmh.co.uk/

Run by Mark Williams, campaigner, speaker and writer, offering support to dads.

FiveXMore

A grassroots organisation committed to changing Black women and birthing people’s maternal health outcomes in the UK.

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Gingerbread

Single parents, equal families. Help and advice on the issues that matter to lone parents.

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The Hub of Hope

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Make Birth Better (Birth Trauma Support)

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Maternal OCD

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arrange

Mayah's Legacy

Supporting and empowering anyone who has experienced pregnancy loss to advocate for themselves.

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0300 102 1596

The Motherhood Group

Dedicated to sharing and supporting the black maternal experience through peer support, projects and advocacy.

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Motivational Mums Club

Offering Trauma, Mindfulness and Meditation sessions for Mothers and Mums to be with an NHS Mental Health Specialist, who’s also a Mother.

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Music Football Fatherhood

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Muslim Women’s Network

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Online chat: www.mwnhelpline.co.uk

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NHS

Contact your local GP surgery.

Call the NHS on 111

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PANDAS

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Email support available – [e-mail]

Perinatal Wellbeing Ontario

PRENATAL, PREGNANCY AND POSTPARTUM SUPPORT & CONNECTION in Canada

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Petals

Petals offers free-of-charge specialist counselling to anyone who has experienced pregnancy

or baby loss.

Web: petalscharity.org/counsellingcontact/

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Tel: [phone]

Samaritans

Tel: 116 123

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Web: www.samaritans.org

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Sands Charity

Emotional and practical support for anyone affected by the death of a baby.

0808 164 3332

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