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A tartalmat a Dr. Janet Steinkamp, EdD and Dr. Janet Steinkamp biztosítja. Az összes podcast-tartalmat, beleértve az epizódokat, grafikákat és podcast-leírásokat, közvetlenül a Dr. Janet Steinkamp, EdD and Dr. Janet Steinkamp vagy a podcast platform partnere tölti fel és biztosítja. Ha úgy gondolja, hogy valaki az Ön engedélye nélkül használja fel a szerzői joggal védett művét, kövesse az itt leírt folyamatot https://hu.player.fm/legal.
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A secret field that summons lightning. A massive spiral that disappears into a salt lake. A celestial observatory carved into a volcano. Meet the wild—and sometimes explosive—world of land art, where artists craft masterpieces with dynamite and bulldozers. In our Season 2 premiere, guest Dylan Thuras, cofounder of Atlas Obscura, takes us off road and into the minds of the artists who literally reshaped parts of the Southwest. These works aren’t meant to be easy to reach—or to explain—but they just might change how you see the world. Land art you’ll visit in this episode: - Double Negative and City by Michael Heizer (Garden Valley, Nevada) - Spiral Jetty by Robert Smithson (Great Salt Lake, Utah) - Sun Tunnels by Nancy Holt (Great Basin Desert, Utah) - Lightning Field by Walter De Maria (Catron County, New Mexico) - Roden Crater by James Turrell (Painted Desert, Arizona) Via Podcast is a production of AAA Mountain West Group.…
When Our Adult Children Walk Away
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A tartalmat a Dr. Janet Steinkamp, EdD and Dr. Janet Steinkamp biztosítja. Az összes podcast-tartalmat, beleértve az epizódokat, grafikákat és podcast-leírásokat, közvetlenül a Dr. Janet Steinkamp, EdD and Dr. Janet Steinkamp vagy a podcast platform partnere tölti fel és biztosítja. Ha úgy gondolja, hogy valaki az Ön engedélye nélkül használja fel a szerzői joggal védett művét, kövesse az itt leírt folyamatot https://hu.player.fm/legal.
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24 epizódok
Mind megjelölése nem lejátszottként
Manage series 3519739
A tartalmat a Dr. Janet Steinkamp, EdD and Dr. Janet Steinkamp biztosítja. Az összes podcast-tartalmat, beleértve az epizódokat, grafikákat és podcast-leírásokat, közvetlenül a Dr. Janet Steinkamp, EdD and Dr. Janet Steinkamp vagy a podcast platform partnere tölti fel és biztosítja. Ha úgy gondolja, hogy valaki az Ön engedélye nélkül használja fel a szerzői joggal védett művét, kövesse az itt leírt folyamatot https://hu.player.fm/legal.
…
continue reading
24 epizódok
Minden epizód
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When Our Adult Children Walk Away

Hi Listeners. I'd love to hear from you. Send an email to Janet@jesteinkamp. It is not possible to respond to your Fan Mail posts directly. Some days are more difficult than others. Some days shine a spotlight on our estrangement grief - the silence and loneliness. These are high-risk days. On high-risk days, the silence can be deafening. High-risk days trigger more intense feelings. Holidays, birthdays, anniversaries, and other important days can be reminders of your estranged adult child. These are what we refer to as high-risk days. High-risk days often reopen emotional wounds and bring the pain and dejection of parental estrangement rushing back because the emotional distance or absence of an estranged adult child becomes more obvious to us - and to others. In this special overview episode, you'll be introduced to the concept of high-risk days and why they can be especially overwhelming for people navigating estrangement. You'll learn what to expect emotionally and why recognizing, planning for, and implementing survival strategies is essential in healing. Strategies are the key to maintaining emotional balance and protecting mental health. Pre-planned strategies empower, fortify and build confidence. First, we plan the plan, and then we follow the plan. This episode is the first in a five-part podcast series dedicated to helping estranged parents prepare for and survive our estrangement's most emotionally vulnerable times. In this episode, you'll discover: · What qualifies as a high-risk day · Why high-risk days often trigger more intense grief and anxiety · How to begin preparing emotionally, mentally and physically If you're a parent estranged from your adult child, this series is designed to give you the language, tools, and support you need to get through these days and gently care for yourself within them. #EstrangedParents #FamilyEstrangement #HighRishDays #SelfCareforParents #CopingWithGrief Support the show For more information, please go to https://www.WhenOurAdultChildrenWalkAway.com to find resources, strategies and tips to prepare to repair! The continuum of estrangement discussed today can be found at https://www.togetherestranged.org/levels-of-estrangement . The stories, examples, reflections, and perspectives shared in this podcast are based on my professional work as an estrangement coach and my personal estrangement journey. Any examples, characters, or stories referenced are either drawn from my own lived experience or represent a composite of multiple real-life situations shared with me over time. The intention of this podcast is not to accuse, label, or defame any individual but to provide insight, validation, and support for those navigating the complexities of family estrangement. All opinions expressed are my own and are shared with you, the listener, from a place of healing and learning.…
Hi Listeners. I'd love to hear from you. Send an email to Janet@jesteinkamp. It is not possible to respond to your Fan Mail posts directly. Mother’s Day can bring up a lot of emotional turmoil, can trigger our grief, and can shine a light on the empty chair at the dinner table - especially when your relationship with your adult child feels broken or distant. In this episode, we’ll examine 10 reasons adult children who are or have been estranged say they step back or walk away from their moms. We'll also consider how you might respond to open the door instead of pushing them further away. We’ll talk through: ✔️ What estranged adult children mean when they bring up things like “control” or “favoritism”. ✔️ How to respond without getting defensive—even when it hurts ✔️ Ways to show empathy, take responsibility, and rebuild trust ✔️ What accountability actually sounds like in real-life conversations This isn’t about blame—it’s about understanding. It’s about getting honest, staying humble, and taking steps toward a healthier relationship, even if that road is long. Support the show For more information, please go to https://www.WhenOurAdultChildrenWalkAway.com to find resources, strategies and tips to prepare to repair! The continuum of estrangement discussed today can be found at https://www.togetherestranged.org/levels-of-estrangement . The stories, examples, reflections, and perspectives shared in this podcast are based on my professional work as an estrangement coach and my personal estrangement journey. Any examples, characters, or stories referenced are either drawn from my own lived experience or represent a composite of multiple real-life situations shared with me over time. The intention of this podcast is not to accuse, label, or defame any individual but to provide insight, validation, and support for those navigating the complexities of family estrangement. All opinions expressed are my own and are shared with you, the listener, from a place of healing and learning.…
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When Our Adult Children Walk Away

Hi Listeners. I'd love to hear from you. Send an email to Janet@jesteinkamp. It is not possible to respond to your Fan Mail posts directly. Ever wondered whether you need a therapist or a coach to help with your family estrangement (or any big life challenge)? Or maybe both? What if a person is professionally licensed and trained as both a therapist and an estrangement coach? In this episode, we break down the key differences between the two—how they work, what they focus on, and who might be the best fit for your circumstances. We’ll talk about when therapy is the right call, when coaching might be a better fit, and how to tell if the professional you’re working with is actually helping. Whether you're looking for deep emotional healing or practical strategies to move forward, this episode will help you figure out your next step! Support the show For more information, please go to https://www.WhenOurAdultChildrenWalkAway.com to find resources, strategies and tips to prepare to repair! The continuum of estrangement discussed today can be found at https://www.togetherestranged.org/levels-of-estrangement . The stories, examples, reflections, and perspectives shared in this podcast are based on my professional work as an estrangement coach and my personal estrangement journey. Any examples, characters, or stories referenced are either drawn from my own lived experience or represent a composite of multiple real-life situations shared with me over time. The intention of this podcast is not to accuse, label, or defame any individual but to provide insight, validation, and support for those navigating the complexities of family estrangement. All opinions expressed are my own and are shared with you, the listener, from a place of healing and learning.…
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When Our Adult Children Walk Away

Hi Listeners. I'd love to hear from you. Send an email to Janet@jesteinkamp. It is not possible to respond to your Fan Mail posts directly. This is a premium Subscriber episode. This is the link to subscribe. https://www.buzzsprout.com/2134816/subscribe Please contact me at Janet@JESteinkamp.com if you have difficulty subscribing or have other questions. Thank you. In this episode, we’re diving into the different but complementary roles therapists and coaches play in family estrangement—whether they’re helping to heal relationships or, sometimes unintentionally, making the divide even deeper. We’ll explore how different approaches can open the door to establishing a healthy and respectful connection or push people further apart. You’ll hear about the impact of therapy models, personal biases, and communication strategies on estranged families. Plus, we’ll discuss how parents and adult children can find professionals who truly support their goals—whether that means working toward reconnection or setting healthier boundaries. If you’ve ever wondered why some therapy helps and some seem to hurt, take a listen! Support the show For more information, please go to https://www.WhenOurAdultChildrenWalkAway.com to find resources, strategies and tips to prepare to repair! The continuum of estrangement discussed today can be found at https://www.togetherestranged.org/levels-of-estrangement . The stories, examples, reflections, and perspectives shared in this podcast are based on my professional work as an estrangement coach and my personal estrangement journey. Any examples, characters, or stories referenced are either drawn from my own lived experience or represent a composite of multiple real-life situations shared with me over time. The intention of this podcast is not to accuse, label, or defame any individual but to provide insight, validation, and support for those navigating the complexities of family estrangement. All opinions expressed are my own and are shared with you, the listener, from a place of healing and learning.…
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When Our Adult Children Walk Away

Hi Listeners. I'd love to hear from you. Send an email to Janet@jesteinkamp. It is not possible to respond to your Fan Mail posts directly. This is a premium Subscriber episode. This is the link to subscribe. https://www.buzzsprout.com/2134816/subscribe Please contact me at Janet@JESteinkamp.com if you have difficulty subscribing or have other questions. Thank you. Unlike the short episode with the same title, this episode examines differences and similarities in how moms and dads describe their experiences and strategies for navigating estrangement. I hesitate to categorize how we experience and navigate estrangement by our gender and family role. The concept oversimplifies and discounts the complexities of our individual, emotional, social, relational, cognitive and physical uniqueness. So, for this episode, please consider your role in the family over your at-birth sex. If you have the role of nurturer, then consider listening as the traditional 'gatherer' or mom role. If you are more of the provider or 'hunter' than listen with an ear for the hunter role. We are each shaped by societal expectations, assigned familial roles, and the people in our lives. We are taught what is right and wrong in the context of societal and family (the people who raise us) values - beliefs - traditions. We grow up in different circumstances and bring our unique selves to our relationships. So, it makes sense that we each have individual relationships with our children. Still, some elements (generally speaking) can be considered familial-role specific. These differences and similarities can influence how we process the distancing of our adult son or daughter, respond to feelings of rejection, and prepare to be our best selves when opportunities to reconnect or connect present themselves. The same is true for our adult children—they see us and experience us as their parents through their unique lenses. Please listen and let me know what you think. You can share your questions and comments at Janet@jesteinkamp or go to the When Our Adult Children Walk Away website and post a comment. I read and respond to all emails that reach my inbox. Remember - be brave! Support the show For more information, please go to https://www.WhenOurAdultChildrenWalkAway.com to find resources, strategies and tips to prepare to repair! The continuum of estrangement discussed today can be found at https://www.togetherestranged.org/levels-of-estrangement . The stories, examples, reflections, and perspectives shared in this podcast are based on my professional work as an estrangement coach and my personal estrangement journey. Any examples, characters, or stories referenced are either drawn from my own lived experience or represent a composite of multiple real-life situations shared with me over time. The intention of this podcast is not to accuse, label, or defame any individual but to provide insight, validation, and support for those navigating the complexities of family estrangement. All opinions expressed are my own and are shared with you, the listener, from a place of healing and learning.…
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When Our Adult Children Walk Away

Hi Listeners. I'd love to hear from you. Send an email to Janet@jesteinkamp. It is not possible to respond to your Fan Mail posts directly. In this episode, we dig into some of the differences and similarities of how moms and dads tell us they experience and navigate estrangement. Yes, dads and moms often experience estrangement differently. And, in ways, similarly. Only... we know it isn't really that simple, right? I hesitate to categorize how we experience and navigate estrangement by our gender. The concept oversimplifies and discounts the complexities of our individual, emotional, social, relational, cognitive and physical uniqueness. We are each shaped by societal expectations, gender roles, and the people around us. We are taught what is right and wrong in the context of our families values. We each are raised in different circumstances and bring our unique selves as a whole to our relationships. So, it only makes sense that we each also have individual relationships with our children. And... still there are some elements (generally speaking) that can be considered gender specific. These differences can influence how we process the distancing of our adult son or daughter, how we respond to feelings of rejection, and how we prepare to be our best selves when opportunities to reconnect or connect present themselves. Take a listen and let me know what you think. Share your questions and comments at Janet@jesteinkamp.com. Or go to the When Our Adult Children Walk Away website and post a comment. I do read and respond to all email that finds it's way to my inbox. Thank you. And be brave! Support the show For more information, please go to https://www.WhenOurAdultChildrenWalkAway.com to find resources, strategies and tips to prepare to repair! The continuum of estrangement discussed today can be found at https://www.togetherestranged.org/levels-of-estrangement . The stories, examples, reflections, and perspectives shared in this podcast are based on my professional work as an estrangement coach and my personal estrangement journey. Any examples, characters, or stories referenced are either drawn from my own lived experience or represent a composite of multiple real-life situations shared with me over time. The intention of this podcast is not to accuse, label, or defame any individual but to provide insight, validation, and support for those navigating the complexities of family estrangement. All opinions expressed are my own and are shared with you, the listener, from a place of healing and learning.…
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When Our Adult Children Walk Away

Hi Listeners. I'd love to hear from you. Send an email to Janet@jesteinkamp. It is not possible to respond to your Fan Mail posts directly. The "Let Them Go" movement grew out of the emerging phenomenon of parental and family estrangement. Originally the movement was based on positive acceptance, open minded awareness, and love. This movement emphasizes personal well-being and the right to distance oneself from harmful dynamics. More recently, the movement has spun off a 2nd movement. We now hear from a “Let Them Go – Good Riddance” faction. In this episode I provide an overview of originally intended “Let Them Go” philosophy. In an extended episode, I will dig deep into the original spirit, how and why the movement morphed to include the “Good Riddance” offshoot. And we compare and contrast the potential outcomes of both. Support the show For more information, please go to https://www.WhenOurAdultChildrenWalkAway.com to find resources, strategies and tips to prepare to repair! The continuum of estrangement discussed today can be found at https://www.togetherestranged.org/levels-of-estrangement . The stories, examples, reflections, and perspectives shared in this podcast are based on my professional work as an estrangement coach and my personal estrangement journey. Any examples, characters, or stories referenced are either drawn from my own lived experience or represent a composite of multiple real-life situations shared with me over time. The intention of this podcast is not to accuse, label, or defame any individual but to provide insight, validation, and support for those navigating the complexities of family estrangement. All opinions expressed are my own and are shared with you, the listener, from a place of healing and learning.…
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When Our Adult Children Walk Away

Hi Listeners. I'd love to hear from you. Send an email to Janet@jesteinkamp. It is not possible to respond to your Fan Mail posts directly. Walking on Eggshells is a concept we use to describe the extreme hypersensitivity parents feel when their relationship with their adult child is faltering. It means being hyper-aware or fearful of saying or doing anything that might upset the estranged child, often to avoid further damage to an already fragile relationship. This can lead to stress, frustration, and feelings of helplessness for parents. One of the most frequent questions I hear is whether the eggshells will always be a part of a struggling relationship. And how to get back to “normal”. This episode introduces the 20 aspects of walking on eggshells – and how to harness the crunching noise to understand your adult child’s boundaries. By embracing your eggshells, you can learn how to relate differently and establish a trust based and mutually gratifying relationship In two future extended episodes, I will dig into 1-10 and 11-20 of the Reasons Walking on Egg Shells is a Gift . Support the show For more information, please go to https://www.WhenOurAdultChildrenWalkAway.com to find resources, strategies and tips to prepare to repair! The continuum of estrangement discussed today can be found at https://www.togetherestranged.org/levels-of-estrangement . The stories, examples, reflections, and perspectives shared in this podcast are based on my professional work as an estrangement coach and my personal estrangement journey. Any examples, characters, or stories referenced are either drawn from my own lived experience or represent a composite of multiple real-life situations shared with me over time. The intention of this podcast is not to accuse, label, or defame any individual but to provide insight, validation, and support for those navigating the complexities of family estrangement. All opinions expressed are my own and are shared with you, the listener, from a place of healing and learning.…
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When Our Adult Children Walk Away

Hi Listeners. I'd love to hear from you. Send an email to Janet@jesteinkamp. It is not possible to respond to your Fan Mail posts directly. In this episode, I discuss six tips that will proactively ensure you give space to your adult child and avoid misrepresentation by others. This topic is a continuation of discussions about communication, how to maintain it, how to ensure direct access if and when either the parent or adult child is compelled to reach out, and how to ensure others represent you accurately to others who may also be in contact with your adult child. These tips will help ensure your communication is authentic, accurate, timely, and respectful. Using these tips, you can engage in proactive communication, demonstrate consistent behavior, and address any potential sources of misrepresentation directly. Support the show For more information, please go to https://www.WhenOurAdultChildrenWalkAway.com to find resources, strategies and tips to prepare to repair! The continuum of estrangement discussed today can be found at https://www.togetherestranged.org/levels-of-estrangement . The stories, examples, reflections, and perspectives shared in this podcast are based on my professional work as an estrangement coach and my personal estrangement journey. Any examples, characters, or stories referenced are either drawn from my own lived experience or represent a composite of multiple real-life situations shared with me over time. The intention of this podcast is not to accuse, label, or defame any individual but to provide insight, validation, and support for those navigating the complexities of family estrangement. All opinions expressed are my own and are shared with you, the listener, from a place of healing and learning.…
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When Our Adult Children Walk Away

Hi Listeners. I'd love to hear from you. Send an email to Janet@jesteinkamp. It is not possible to respond to your Fan Mail posts directly. In this episode, we consider avoiding or getting out of the habit of catastrophizing. You might be saying, “Hasn’t the worst already happened?” I suggest that it hasn’t. Or, maybe it’s more accurate to say that anticipating a catastrophe does not help move you toward preparing to repair and establish a new connection. Catastrophizing holds you in disbelief, anger and despair. Catastrophizing is a common behavior that affects many people during times of stress. Well… when is life more stressful than when our adult child starts pulling away, stops communicating constructively or goes no contact? The good news is that catastrophizing does not necessarily signal a mental health condition. In fact, preparing for the worst-case scenario can be a coping mechanism and defense mechanism. However, it is also true that if it becomes a chronic habit or interferes with daily life and functioning, it may be a sign of depression or anxiety. If you find yourself unable to stop the worst-case cycling in your head, please consider finding a licensed mental health provider who can assist in quieting the cycle. Support the show For more information, please go to https://www.WhenOurAdultChildrenWalkAway.com to find resources, strategies and tips to prepare to repair! The continuum of estrangement discussed today can be found at https://www.togetherestranged.org/levels-of-estrangement . The stories, examples, reflections, and perspectives shared in this podcast are based on my professional work as an estrangement coach and my personal estrangement journey. Any examples, characters, or stories referenced are either drawn from my own lived experience or represent a composite of multiple real-life situations shared with me over time. The intention of this podcast is not to accuse, label, or defame any individual but to provide insight, validation, and support for those navigating the complexities of family estrangement. All opinions expressed are my own and are shared with you, the listener, from a place of healing and learning.…
Hi Listeners. I'd love to hear from you. Send an email to Janet@jesteinkamp. It is not possible to respond to your Fan Mail posts directly. In this episode, we crack the Busy Body Code. I share several easy strategies to manage a busy body by controlling your message. You can protect your privacy, ensuring that more energy can focus on maintaining emotional well-being. I share several responses you can use when approached by even the most well-meaning "share-er." I provide ways to sort through publicly neutral messaging to ensure the difficulties you're experiencing with your adult child are not enflamed by misinformation or the appearance that you aren't protecting your family's privacy. Support the show For more information, please go to https://www.WhenOurAdultChildrenWalkAway.com to find resources, strategies and tips to prepare to repair! The continuum of estrangement discussed today can be found at https://www.togetherestranged.org/levels-of-estrangement . The stories, examples, reflections, and perspectives shared in this podcast are based on my professional work as an estrangement coach and my personal estrangement journey. Any examples, characters, or stories referenced are either drawn from my own lived experience or represent a composite of multiple real-life situations shared with me over time. The intention of this podcast is not to accuse, label, or defame any individual but to provide insight, validation, and support for those navigating the complexities of family estrangement. All opinions expressed are my own and are shared with you, the listener, from a place of healing and learning.…
Hi Listeners. I'd love to hear from you. Send an email to Janet@jesteinkamp. It is not possible to respond to your Fan Mail posts directly. So often, people who love and support us are also in contact with or know our distancing or estranged adult child. I'm frequently asked whether it is "a good idea" or "will it work" to have one of these people talk to the adult child on the parent's behalf. I also hear stories about people taking it upon themselves to approach an adult child without the parent's involvement—to defend us, advocate for us, or encourage our adult children to "stop the madness." The third scenario related to this topic involves parents recruiting, encouraging or requesting that a friend or family member approach their estranged child to advocate on their behalf. Regardless of who, how or why people advocate for us, after a time, these efforts often end in more sadness and disappointment for the parent. So, how can we make sense of it when advocacy for the parents does not bring the intended outcomes? In this episode, I explore these three scenarios from the adult child's perspective. You'll hear some strategies for navigating all three, and I'll explain why ensuring a clear and direct path for communication between the adult child and estranged parent becomes essential. This episode explores this topic in more depth. For a quick overview, check out the (Short) episode with the same title. Support the show For more information, please go to https://www.WhenOurAdultChildrenWalkAway.com to find resources, strategies and tips to prepare to repair! The continuum of estrangement discussed today can be found at https://www.togetherestranged.org/levels-of-estrangement . The stories, examples, reflections, and perspectives shared in this podcast are based on my professional work as an estrangement coach and my personal estrangement journey. Any examples, characters, or stories referenced are either drawn from my own lived experience or represent a composite of multiple real-life situations shared with me over time. The intention of this podcast is not to accuse, label, or defame any individual but to provide insight, validation, and support for those navigating the complexities of family estrangement. All opinions expressed are my own and are shared with you, the listener, from a place of healing and learning.…
Hi Listeners. I'd love to hear from you. Send an email to Janet@jesteinkamp. It is not possible to respond to your Fan Mail posts directly. So often, people who love and support us are also in contact with or know our distancing or estranged adult child. I'm often asked whether it is "a good idea" or "will it work" to have one of these people talk to the adult child on the parent's behalf. I also hear stories about people taking it upon themselves to approach an adult child without the parent's involvement—to defend us, advocate for us, or encourage our adult children to "stop the madness." The third scenario related to this topic involves parents recruiting, encouraging or requesting that a friend or family member approach their estranged child to advocate on their behalf. Regardless of who, how or why people advocate for us, after a time, these efforts often end in more sadness and disappointment for the parent. So, how can we make sense of it when advocacy on behalf of the parent’s does not bring the intended outcomes? In this episode, I explore these three scenarios from the adult child's perspective. You'll hear some strategies for navigating all three, and I'll explain why ensuring a clear and direct path for communication between the adult child and estranged parent becomes essential. This episode is a shorter introduction to the topic. For a deeper dive, you can find the expanded episode on the When Our Adult Children Walk Away website. Support the show For more information, please go to https://www.WhenOurAdultChildrenWalkAway.com to find resources, strategies and tips to prepare to repair! The continuum of estrangement discussed today can be found at https://www.togetherestranged.org/levels-of-estrangement . The stories, examples, reflections, and perspectives shared in this podcast are based on my professional work as an estrangement coach and my personal estrangement journey. Any examples, characters, or stories referenced are either drawn from my own lived experience or represent a composite of multiple real-life situations shared with me over time. The intention of this podcast is not to accuse, label, or defame any individual but to provide insight, validation, and support for those navigating the complexities of family estrangement. All opinions expressed are my own and are shared with you, the listener, from a place of healing and learning.…
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When Our Adult Children Walk Away

1 What the H@!! are they talking about? Reproductive Memory vs Reconstructive Memory (Definitions and Differences) Short 5:01
Hi Listeners. I'd love to hear from you. Send an email to Janet@jesteinkamp. It is not possible to respond to your Fan Mail posts directly. Memory distortion is common in our human experience. It can be particularly relevant in crumbling relationships between parents and their adult children. Too often, what were once happy or benign memories morph - seemingly - suddenly into abusive and traumatic events. Parents are often caught off guard and sent reeling into a cycle of disbelief, anger, helplessness and pain. To complicate matters further, outsiders can influence or drive the reconstructive process. Have you heard the terms Gaslighting and Cult of One? Check out those specific episodes for more information. So, what is the difference between what we organically recall (reproductive memory) and the changed or revised version (reconstructive memory)? The metamorphosis of memory can and does affect us all. If you think it doesn't happen to you, read things you wrote years ago. Consider a diary or your child's baby book. You will likely find discrepancies between what you wrote and when you recall. You might wonder if you mistakenly wrote things in the original document or if your memories have changed. Revision of memory is a usual and natural human process. However, in the face of estrangement, transforming memory can and often does lead to disastrous outcomes. Listen in to learn more about the differences and processes that take place. When you want more information and to explore this topic more deeply, look for the extended version. Support the show For more information, please go to https://www.WhenOurAdultChildrenWalkAway.com to find resources, strategies and tips to prepare to repair! The continuum of estrangement discussed today can be found at https://www.togetherestranged.org/levels-of-estrangement . The stories, examples, reflections, and perspectives shared in this podcast are based on my professional work as an estrangement coach and my personal estrangement journey. Any examples, characters, or stories referenced are either drawn from my own lived experience or represent a composite of multiple real-life situations shared with me over time. The intention of this podcast is not to accuse, label, or defame any individual but to provide insight, validation, and support for those navigating the complexities of family estrangement. All opinions expressed are my own and are shared with you, the listener, from a place of healing and learning.…
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When Our Adult Children Walk Away

Hi Listeners. I'd love to hear from you. Send an email to Janet@jesteinkamp. It is not possible to respond to your Fan Mail posts directly. A few years ago, in the middle years of our family's estrangement from my adult daughter and grandchildren, I adopted the phrase " Parent Partner .” I borrowed the term from the early days of divorcing parents (remember Gweneth Paltro's divorce from Chris Martin?) working together to co-parent young children. The concept is that divorcing p arent-partners choose to work collaboratively, in a friendly manner, to jointly parent young children. They may even vacation together, celebrate birthdays together, etc. The separation we - the parents - experience from our maturing children is actually a close cousin to the concept of divorce. If we manage it well, it doesn't have to lead to estrangement. The Oxford Dictionary defines divorce as " the separation or dissociation from something.” Isn’t this what happens as our children individuate from us in their young adult years? In my experience, it certainly felt like a divorce at times. Individuation is natural. It is natural for our adult children to separate from us as their primary family - to create their own separate lives. So (insert shoulder shrug here), why not adapt proactively and intentionally in our relationship with our adult child? This episode provides 10 tips for growing into the parent-partner role, including how to integrate our adult children's expectations and needs - in the face of today's complex world - so we can stay connected and actively involved in their lives - AND not risk estrangement. Support the show For more information, please go to https://www.WhenOurAdultChildrenWalkAway.com to find resources, strategies and tips to prepare to repair! The continuum of estrangement discussed today can be found at https://www.togetherestranged.org/levels-of-estrangement . The stories, examples, reflections, and perspectives shared in this podcast are based on my professional work as an estrangement coach and my personal estrangement journey. Any examples, characters, or stories referenced are either drawn from my own lived experience or represent a composite of multiple real-life situations shared with me over time. The intention of this podcast is not to accuse, label, or defame any individual but to provide insight, validation, and support for those navigating the complexities of family estrangement. All opinions expressed are my own and are shared with you, the listener, from a place of healing and learning.…
Hi Listeners. I'd love to hear from you. Send an email to Janet@jesteinkamp. It is not possible to respond to your Fan Mail posts directly. In healthy and effective communication, the strategic use of apologies and explanations can significantly influence the outcome and effectiveness of our efforts to manage potential rifts in our relationships. Both play an essential role in maintaining trust, reducing confusion and ensuring seemingly small grievances don’t become catastrophic. Where apologies address the emotional aspects of a conflict, explanations tackle the rational side. By understanding when and how to use each communication tool strategically, we can foster an environment of trust, clarity, and mutual respect, leading to a more healthy and mutually respectful relationship. In this episode, I provide a brief and specific explanation of the differences between an apology and an explanation. Listen to the extended episode to learn more about how and when to use each. Support the show For more information, please go to https://www.WhenOurAdultChildrenWalkAway.com to find resources, strategies and tips to prepare to repair! The continuum of estrangement discussed today can be found at https://www.togetherestranged.org/levels-of-estrangement . The stories, examples, reflections, and perspectives shared in this podcast are based on my professional work as an estrangement coach and my personal estrangement journey. Any examples, characters, or stories referenced are either drawn from my own lived experience or represent a composite of multiple real-life situations shared with me over time. The intention of this podcast is not to accuse, label, or defame any individual but to provide insight, validation, and support for those navigating the complexities of family estrangement. All opinions expressed are my own and are shared with you, the listener, from a place of healing and learning.…
Hi Listeners. I'd love to hear from you. Send an email to Janet@jesteinkamp. It is not possible to respond to your Fan Mail posts directly. Parenting doesn't end when our children grow into adulthood; it just evolves into a different phase with its own set of challenges. Parents often struggle with letting their children become independent adults. It can be hard to transition from being the primary decision-maker to taking a backseat role in their lives. We are challenged to Let Go. We are faced with finding a new balance in how much support we provide and how much we honor our maturing children in their quest for independence. We face different and heavy financial concerns. Communication changes and boundaries shift. We begin to experience empty nest syndrome and our adult relationships may shift without children at the center. And, last but not least, the expectations of both parents and adult children evolve. In this episode, I begin to scratch the surface of this ominous and sometimes joyous stage of parenting. Grab a chair and take a listen. Thanks for joining in! Support the show For more information, please go to https://www.WhenOurAdultChildrenWalkAway.com to find resources, strategies and tips to prepare to repair! The continuum of estrangement discussed today can be found at https://www.togetherestranged.org/levels-of-estrangement . The stories, examples, reflections, and perspectives shared in this podcast are based on my professional work as an estrangement coach and my personal estrangement journey. Any examples, characters, or stories referenced are either drawn from my own lived experience or represent a composite of multiple real-life situations shared with me over time. The intention of this podcast is not to accuse, label, or defame any individual but to provide insight, validation, and support for those navigating the complexities of family estrangement. All opinions expressed are my own and are shared with you, the listener, from a place of healing and learning.…
Hi Listeners. I'd love to hear from you. Send an email to Janet@jesteinkamp. It is not possible to respond to your Fan Mail posts directly. https://www.whenouradultchildrenwalkaway.com/about One of the most frequent questions I'm asked is, "How do I know if my child is cutting ties and wants to be estranged?" Why is it important to understand the differences and similarities? Knowing the difference helps us assess the health of a relationship. Take a listen as I dig in and talk about the differences. And - importantly - the similarities. Support the show For more information, please go to https://www.WhenOurAdultChildrenWalkAway.com to find resources, strategies and tips to prepare to repair! The continuum of estrangement discussed today can be found at https://www.togetherestranged.org/levels-of-estrangement . The stories, examples, reflections, and perspectives shared in this podcast are based on my professional work as an estrangement coach and my personal estrangement journey. Any examples, characters, or stories referenced are either drawn from my own lived experience or represent a composite of multiple real-life situations shared with me over time. The intention of this podcast is not to accuse, label, or defame any individual but to provide insight, validation, and support for those navigating the complexities of family estrangement. All opinions expressed are my own and are shared with you, the listener, from a place of healing and learning.…
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When Our Adult Children Walk Away

Hi Listeners. I'd love to hear from you. Send an email to Janet@jesteinkamp. It is not possible to respond to your Fan Mail posts directly. Determining the level of estrangement between you and your adult child can involve some introspection and assessment of your relationship dynamics. Are you asking yourself questions like: What is the Continuum of Estrangement? What is the progression of distancing? How do I know if my adult son or daughter is on the continuum? How do I slow down the increasing distancing of my son or daughter? This episode is a great place to get initial insights into your questions and some information to help find answers. Let's get started. Listen in to this session and learn more about the Continuum, how to assess your relationship, and how to begin to slow down the distancing. Support the show For more information, please go to https://www.WhenOurAdultChildrenWalkAway.com to find resources, strategies and tips to prepare to repair! The continuum of estrangement discussed today can be found at https://www.togetherestranged.org/levels-of-estrangement . The stories, examples, reflections, and perspectives shared in this podcast are based on my professional work as an estrangement coach and my personal estrangement journey. Any examples, characters, or stories referenced are either drawn from my own lived experience or represent a composite of multiple real-life situations shared with me over time. The intention of this podcast is not to accuse, label, or defame any individual but to provide insight, validation, and support for those navigating the complexities of family estrangement. All opinions expressed are my own and are shared with you, the listener, from a place of healing and learning.…
Hi Listeners. I'd love to hear from you. Send an email to Janet@jesteinkamp. It is not possible to respond to your Fan Mail posts directly. For parents and adult children experiencing some level of estrangement (see the Continuum of Estrangment link below) understanding what an authentic apology means can be pivotal in repairing their differences. In this episode we dig deeper into the 5 imposters of an authentic apology. You will learn how to recognize and avoid these imposters, preparing you to recognize your responsibililities, how to hold yourself accountable and how to communicate your authentic apology. An authentic apology is more than just a string of words; it's a genuine acknowledgment of wrongdoing, accompanied by sincere remorse and a commitment to make amends. An authentic apology requires humility, vulnerability, and sincerity. It's not about saving face or avoiding consequences but about genuinely seeking to repair the harm caused and rebuild trust and respect in the relationship. The continuum of estrangement discussed today can be found at https://www.togetherestranged.org/levels-of-estrangement . Support the show For more information, please go to https://www.WhenOurAdultChildrenWalkAway.com to find resources, strategies and tips to prepare to repair! The continuum of estrangement discussed today can be found at https://www.togetherestranged.org/levels-of-estrangement . The stories, examples, reflections, and perspectives shared in this podcast are based on my professional work as an estrangement coach and my personal estrangement journey. Any examples, characters, or stories referenced are either drawn from my own lived experience or represent a composite of multiple real-life situations shared with me over time. The intention of this podcast is not to accuse, label, or defame any individual but to provide insight, validation, and support for those navigating the complexities of family estrangement. All opinions expressed are my own and are shared with you, the listener, from a place of healing and learning.…
Hi Listeners. I'd love to hear from you. Send an email to Janet@jesteinkamp. It is not possible to respond to your Fan Mail posts directly. If you've listened to other WOACWA podcast episodes, you know that I ground my work in effective, respectful, and intentional communication. I integrate communication training with my six-stage Estrangement Grief Model (Disbelief, Anger, Despair, Acceptance, Transformation and Maintenance). By this, I mean that our estrangement journey can be most effectively navigated and remedied by reflecting on our relational circumstances, holding ourselves accountable for our own contributions to the estrangement, understanding and embracing our grief, and mastering our interpersonal behaviors and - critical to our success - by strengthening our communication style. So, having said all of that, what are the 3 truths about why, when and how we choose to write an amends letter? And, what is the lie? Or maybe more accurately, what are the untruths we tell ourselves? Let's get started!! Support the show For more information, please go to https://www.WhenOurAdultChildrenWalkAway.com to find resources, strategies and tips to prepare to repair! The continuum of estrangement discussed today can be found at https://www.togetherestranged.org/levels-of-estrangement . The stories, examples, reflections, and perspectives shared in this podcast are based on my professional work as an estrangement coach and my personal estrangement journey. Any examples, characters, or stories referenced are either drawn from my own lived experience or represent a composite of multiple real-life situations shared with me over time. The intention of this podcast is not to accuse, label, or defame any individual but to provide insight, validation, and support for those navigating the complexities of family estrangement. All opinions expressed are my own and are shared with you, the listener, from a place of healing and learning.…
Hi Listeners. I'd love to hear from you. Send an email to Janet@jesteinkamp. It is not possible to respond to your Fan Mail posts directly. [ This episode was recorded and produced in November of 2023. It was published and distributed in January of 2024. The content is applicable to all holiday celebrations and gatherings. Our apologies for the delayed availability.] Dealing with the holidays as estranged parents can be challenging, but it's possible to navigate this time with self-care, communication, and thoughtful planning. In this episode, we explore the unique pressures and triggers of family celebrations to help estranged parents survive the holidays. Remember, the key is to prioritize your well-being and the well-being of your adult children. I encourage you to seek support and make decisions that will contribute to a more positive and manageable holiday experience. Support the show For more information, please go to https://www.WhenOurAdultChildrenWalkAway.com to find resources, strategies and tips to prepare to repair! The continuum of estrangement discussed today can be found at https://www.togetherestranged.org/levels-of-estrangement . The stories, examples, reflections, and perspectives shared in this podcast are based on my professional work as an estrangement coach and my personal estrangement journey. Any examples, characters, or stories referenced are either drawn from my own lived experience or represent a composite of multiple real-life situations shared with me over time. The intention of this podcast is not to accuse, label, or defame any individual but to provide insight, validation, and support for those navigating the complexities of family estrangement. All opinions expressed are my own and are shared with you, the listener, from a place of healing and learning.…
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When Our Adult Children Walk Away

Hi Listeners. I'd love to hear from you. Send an email to Janet@jesteinkamp. It is not possible to respond to your Fan Mail posts directly. Are you cycling through your emotions at warp speed? Are you angry in one moment and crippled by sadness in the next? Are you feeling helpless and hopeless? Wondering if life will ever be good again? Are you embarrassed to tell your friends, or perhaps your friends begin to pull away when you tell them about your broken relationship? In this episode, I provide an overview of the six stages of estrangement grief. Disbelief, Anger, Despair, Acceptance, Transformation and Maintenance. This episode is the 1st segment of a 7-part series. Footnote: Since this recording, the first stage of the Estrangement Grief Cycle has been renamed from Denial to Disbelief. This is due to the differing aspects of grief related to death vs aspects of grief related to estrangement. Please listen to Episode 4 to hear a more extensive explanation of the differences. Thank you. Support the show For more information, please go to https://www.WhenOurAdultChildrenWalkAway.com to find resources, strategies and tips to prepare to repair! The continuum of estrangement discussed today can be found at https://www.togetherestranged.org/levels-of-estrangement . The stories, examples, reflections, and perspectives shared in this podcast are based on my professional work as an estrangement coach and my personal estrangement journey. Any examples, characters, or stories referenced are either drawn from my own lived experience or represent a composite of multiple real-life situations shared with me over time. The intention of this podcast is not to accuse, label, or defame any individual but to provide insight, validation, and support for those navigating the complexities of family estrangement. All opinions expressed are my own and are shared with you, the listener, from a place of healing and learning.…
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When Our Adult Children Walk Away

Hi Listeners. I'd love to hear from you. Send an email to Janet@jesteinkamp. It is not possible to respond to your Fan Mail posts directly. Hello Sweet Parents, Welcome to the When Our Adult Children Walk Away Podcast . I invite you to join me for a series of episodes in which we dig deep into the challenges today's parents face as we navigate the expectations of our adult children. In each episode, I explore a different aspect of estrangement, including the continuum of separation, the estrangement grief cycle, the critical role of communication in estranged relationships, the differences in how parents and our adult children experience estrangement, how to navigate the dark and silent times, and how to prepare to repair. Checkout our podcast episodes and begin to: Let go of guilt, blame & the what-ifs Get unstuck from your dark and lonely isolation Learn to maximize the quiet times for your growth Understand your and your adult child’s communication style Create a path forward that honors you and your adult child Find a renewed sense of purpose and hope Like all services provided at WhenOurAdultChildrenWalkAway.com , this podcast is designed to meet the unique and complex circumstances of each individual's estrangement journey. You can do as much or as little as you need to help navigate the rocky terrain of your journey Please pick an episode that sounds like it may help you today – at this moment. Click in, and take a listen. I hope that you find encouragement and renewed hope in what you hear. Thank you for joining me! -Janet Support the show For more information, please go to https://www.WhenOurAdultChildrenWalkAway.com to find resources, strategies and tips to prepare to repair! The continuum of estrangement discussed today can be found at https://www.togetherestranged.org/levels-of-estrangement . The stories, examples, reflections, and perspectives shared in this podcast are based on my professional work as an estrangement coach and my personal estrangement journey. Any examples, characters, or stories referenced are either drawn from my own lived experience or represent a composite of multiple real-life situations shared with me over time. The intention of this podcast is not to accuse, label, or defame any individual but to provide insight, validation, and support for those navigating the complexities of family estrangement. All opinions expressed are my own and are shared with you, the listener, from a place of healing and learning.…
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